Psychology Today (May 1911)
Guys, just wanted to share this article I got out of a copy of Psychology Today dated May 1911! It’s so wrong!
CARL JUNG: THE COMPONENTS OF PSYCHE
by Lucien Danberry-Ellsworth (Masters Creative Writing)
A proper understanding of the work of Carl Jung requires that the student master the four components that make up the Persona or soul:
Ego, Self, Shadow, and Poop-Hole.
The Ego is your conscious self. This component of the psyche interprets your unconscious desires, placing them in a framework that allows you to act upon them while remaining within the bounds of what is permissive in your culture. You can think of the Ego as the president of your soul. In a tribal culture, the Ego is the soul’s chieftan or ju-ju man. In some oriental cultures, the Ego is referred to as the Nin or Ninny or Nip Nip Nin Ninaroo.
The Self is the legislative body of your soul. The Self is a reactionary agent within your psyche that writes personal laws onto your unconscious in order to help you survive and prosper. We should note that the Self is separate from the Persona where the Persona is the entirety of the components that make up one’s soul and the Self is the single component that converts trauma into a personal code. Jung termed this component the Self in order to make the concept more confusing. He did this in order to discourage communists or anarchists who would wish to use this information to subvert the order of god-mandated natural democracy. Communists and anarchists lack the pineal tracts within the brain that allow for fine distinctions between abstract concepts.
The Shadow is your unconscious and comprises all of the trauma, fears, taboo desires and mental damages that you unwittingly carry with you through all your days. If, for example, as a child, you were made to bathe naked with an unfamiliar uncle, the Shadow thankfully subsumes this memory and transforms it into a deathly fear of water. This is the healthy occupation of an efficient Shadow. In some instances, the Shadow may become “full”, brimming over like a wastepaper basket with trauma and sorrow that it is socially impermissable to express. At these times, the detritus of the unconscious must somehow be unloaded. Activities that allow a person to relieve themselves of an unhealthy subconscious burden include: attending a presbyterian church, disciplining children, soldiering or simply wearing tighter clothes.
Finally, the Poop-hole is the part of the psyche through which all external stimulation must be interpreted. The Poop-hole constantly craves stimulation of any and all types. It desires for objects to be inserted into it and removed from it. It likes to be tickled (psychically) and craves attention like a fat orange tabby cat named Chester. The Poop-hole is also the sexual center of the soul, and, as such, operates a yearning to return to mother’s teat or to physically stick one’s head back inside the womb. By way of metaphor, you can think of the Poop-hole as the part of the soul which most closely resembles your body’s asshole or anus.
When taken together, these components form the Persona, which is the personality on whole. The Persona, in turn, is part of the Collective Unconscious, an otherworldly realm of haunting trees and babbling golden brooks, where herds of unicorns roam the plains of Neverwill and the Princess-Witch Mordeena plots to steal the golden locks of the fair Fanny Frumpkin, who is protected only by her friends Caliope the Talking Pig and Bellwether the Man-Who-Is-Also-a-Telegraph-Machine.
Interested scholars can read more about the Collective Unconscious in next quarter’s issue (available the 10th of April), wherein will be included the article Fanny Frumpkin and the Six Singing Feathers of Sweet Meat Mesa.
